Thursday, May 21, 2009

Africans are not monogamous

PART 1:
An African is hitting on me, but subtly, too subtly. Like teenagers hit on each other: physically being close and never initiating any contact. This is someone in his 40s that hangs out with people under 25 and lives and behaves like he is 25.

You are immature and thus rather dangerous, plus you live on a different planet where other 20yr olds live of night clubs, parties, showing off, etc. I asked you if you were hitting on me, because it seemed so, you never replied. To me, no reply means that you just were hoping to snatch a little if it falls in your lap, maybe sleep with me if I push for it, etc. There is nothing serious there, otherwise you'd own it and act on it.

That's how it is understood on the planet I live on. On my planet, people meditate and pray regularly, and Inner Work and Clarity are the most important things, and effort in that direction is expected as much as we are capable of.

I am not interested in flirting and sleeping. I am only human so if I am single and flirt here and there, that's understandable. I just won't act on it. I intend to find Mr. Right and live happily ever after.


PART 2:

An African hit on me. Everyone saw it. Then he went away and the next day ignored me and hit on someone else. That someone else was extatic and made sure I knew it. I was just thinking OH GOD GET ME OUT OF HERE THIS IS COMPLETELY FOREIGN TO ME.

First, now I am positive that you were hitting on me. Others told me. I ignored it because a teenager having a crush and looking at me is just a nuisance. 20 yr olds under the spell of hormones do that. I am a 45 yr old woman with wrinkles and wanting to be married to a Real and good *man*. Your hitting style is not even flattering to me, it is just a nuisance, you have no maturity to even be a gentleman, you are incapable of treating me or anyone else properly. Also, where is your live-in girlfriend, you have no respect for her whatsoever. Do you just flirt with anyone as soon as your partner is out of sight? And not even that. You were flirting with me when you had her at home. That is terrifying to me. You are a crook.

What you do is plain awful and makes me avoid you as much as I possibly can.

You always seem to try to flirt with the highest bidder who will give you most attention, esp when you feel ignored. So you hang out with the skirt that is most subservient to you at the moment, and as soon as they give you one little bit of trouble, you dump them and hop to the next pleasing skirt. Yes you are a good person and thus you can charm your way, but it is crippling you, and them too, and it is ugly for anyone else. You are simply fake.

Finding consolation in women as if they were objects, jelousy games and hiding under skirts is ignorance and weakness and major immaturity.

You don't seem to be able to stand on your own, you need women to hold you up, and you even consciously try to pit women against each other.
Also, you are helping your flirts turn into beggar who lives off male attention instead of having the confidence to stand on her own.

Everyone likes a little attention here and there, but to depend on it as a bread and butter of living, like you and your ladies do, is an addiction.

Depending on attention from others is a major weakness, crippling any possible self growth.

Nobody can give us anything. It all comes from God.



AFTERTHOUGHT:

What opposites, African party boy and a Serbian spiritual person with a guru and meditation group.

Sorry for calling you a crook. In my world, you are a crook, but that doesn't count, what counts to you is your world, where you are simply popular.

Also, Africans are not monogamous. Running around is normal to you and your culture.

I am Serbian and very monogamous. What is normal to me is spending lifetime with one person and never even looking around. I have never seen my father flirt with anyone, he always gave all attention to my mother and still does, and I wish for me a man like that. My mother treats my father in kind. My parents are like One. My brother and his wife too. My other brother and his wife as well. I wish the same for my marriage too.

There are some nice aspects of African that I embrace, like community, and there are some ugly aspects of Serbian that I am Working to overcome.
It really is about being a citizen of the World, with integrity and dignity. I happen to believe and have it confirmed by Elders that dedicated partnership, not looking into the left eye of the opposite sex, and not being tickled and fed by the attention from others is the proper way to go.

Even Africans who have "something" higher in them, like Yousuff Koumbassa, have that.

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